The Awe of Awesome

Things have not been the easiest in our world lately. In the last 18 months the universe has thrown some huge challenges our way and these have gotten to me more than the rest of the family and perhaps more than it would have got to others. This has changed in a huge way for me in the last month.

If you ask what has changed, the answer is honestly….nothing! Really though, what has changed is my mind set and my determination.  There have been a number of things that have turned things for me.  It started with my own realisation that I can not control what others think of me, or what lies may be told about me. The second change, my boss arranged some training for me and my peers and it was truly life changing for me.

This training made me realise that I control me, only me, my thoughts, my actions and to some extent I can control my own feelings.  I am responsible to people but not responsible for people. You may ask how these things have made such a difference? I realised, if I am feeling down and stressed, I can fix it all by myself. I no longer need to let this become a spiral.  I can stop and remember a time that I was hugely happy. Not just remember it as a memory, but remember the way it felt in my body, remember how it felt to smile so much that my face hurt, to laugh so much I could hardly breathe, to be so excited the butterflies in my stomach feel like an elephant having a dance party. If I can remember those feelings and start to take myself to that place, the stress and frustrations suddenly seem insignificant, and what previously seemed impossible now seems not only possible but almost easy.

Don’t get me wrong, this took 3 days of, what at time was frustrating, listening and practising my self talk in an environment dedicated to it.  These three days meant that I have been slowly able to transfer this to everyday life (not every time but it is getting there).

So what you may say, good on you! This has been significant not only in my day job but with my kids, husband and even my puppy.  I have found myself staying calm where I would have erupted previously. I have seen myself digging deeper with my kids to find out the root of issues. I have found a new appreciation for how what I do makes other feel. To remember I am responsible to others but to for others.

Am I now perfect? No! I am awesome.  This is my biggest revelation.  I, as a human being, am awesome.  I am not perfect by any means but I now appreciate that I am awesome as a person.  EVERYONE is awesome as a human being. If we take the time to talk to people, to understand them, listen to their stories, you will see the awesome in everyone. It has helped me to appreciate all those around me, and even to appreciate myself….this is a big first for me to even contemplate appreciating myself.  I have found the awe of awesome.

 

Netty

 

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